The Dark Always Comes Before The Dawn
by just a pet
Summary: Bella is changed, but the Cullens are no where in sight when the agony subsides.  When an angry, but devastated Jacob comes across her, what will be the out come?  What will the pack say?  What will Jacob do?  Where is Edward and the rest of the family?
1. The Change

**I do not own any of the characters in this fanfic, they all belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

It was finally time. Edward stood in front of me with pleading eyes. His whole being begged me not to make him do this. I smiled awkwardly at him. He closed his eyes and shook his head. I traced the contours of his body with my eyes; he was just as chiseled as he was three years ago. Three long, dangerous, and sometimes painful years. But this is what I wanted; I wanted to be with Edward for the rest of eternity. It didn't matter the trials and tribulations that followed, I would endure anything for a life with him.

Carlisle stood away from the two of us, giving us the time we he thought we needed. Esme stood at his side, her arm snaked around his waist. She cocked her head up at him, staring at his face, mumbling too quickly for me to understand. Jasper was absent from this ceremony, his desire for blood was still too much for him to handle, he didn't want to risk ruining my chances of survival, Edward had told me. Alice was here though; she was perky as every chattering on to Rosalie and Emmet about having a new addition to the family.

Carlisle cleared his throat and began to close the gap between us. He motioned for Alice, Rosalie and Emmet to come forward. He looked around slowly, taking in all our features. He paused when he came to me, and began speaking. "Isabella Swan, do you hereby accept the rights and restrictions of becoming a member of this family, for the rest of your days?" He tilted his head slightly as he looked at me, frowning.

I nodded, "yes I do." Edward dropped his arms to his sides, reaching for my hand. His icy skin sent chills through my body as he tightened his grip. He was tense beside me; jaw clinched together, eyes closed as he took in our words.

"Does the majority of this family accept her into our home?" As Carlisle spoke, he eyed each of his children, and his partner, Esme. She nodded solemnly. Rosalie shook her head viciously, her golden hair fanned out beneath her. Emmet nodded, flashing a grin at me before turning back.

Alice sat up straight and nodded. "Jasper agrees too," she piped up breaking the silence.

I looked at Edward, it was his turn. He tightened his jaw, never opening his eyes, he shook his head silently. I bowed my head; I felt pain rip through me. He was so upset and I was so selfish, I just want to be with him, damn the rest. Tears started rimming my eyes; I blinked furiously to push them back.

Suddenly, Edward cupped my face in his hands. His eyes begged of me something I couldn't give him. I tried to look away, but his grip was firm. He leaned forward and I felt his breath on my neck, I shivered involuntarily. I closed my eyes for a moment, but as I did, he pushed himself forward crushing his hard lips against mine. He seemed for have forgotten his boundaries as I felt his tongue push my lips open. He kissed me desperately, like never before. I could no longer hold myself up and as my knees began to give out, he wrapped an arm around me pulling me into his sculpted body. Everything around me faded away, Carlisle, Esme, Rosalie, Emmet, Alice; nobody was there except for me and Edward.

His hand traveled up and down my back as he continued kissing me. His cool tongue explored my mouth urgently. Finally he broke our kiss. The world spun around me, and my heart was beating so fast I thought I would pass out. I tried to look at him, but I was frozen in place.

Abruptly I felt coolness on my neck, right behind me ear. He kissed my repeatedly on my warm neck as he trailed downward. He came almost to my shoulder when he stopped. I opened my eyes, trying to look at him, but I couldn't. I could feel him pull back a little, and before I could say or do anything my shoulder ached in pain. Heat shot through my body towards the wound that Edward inflicted.

I cried out in pain as he stepped back. His arm still around my waist, he laid me down in the soft, damp grass. I squirmed uncontrollably, trying to defend my wounded body, instinctively. I opened my eyes in little spurts, not being able to keep them open for very long. Once, Edward was above me, staring directly at me. I tried to reach for him, but blackness overtook me before my hand left the ground.

My wrist began to burn as I writhed on the ground, then my other wrist. Tears poured out my eyes as I tried curl myself up. Cool hands gently held my body in place as I screamed, I screamed as loud as I could. I wasn't ready for this, it hurts too badly, and I don't want this!

Things started to move slowly. I could hear my heart beating in my chest as I arched my body upwards in pain. My extremities held down, ceasing any other movement. I yelped as one of my ankles pinched, what was left of my heat glided down my leg to the wound. I was becoming still, I could count the seconds between my heart beats. My mind was starting to go black.

1…2…

My other ankle was pinched in the same way, it was almost done. I felt no heat rush to this wound, no warmth was left. I tried to peel my eyes open, but I couldn't tell if they were open or closed. Both worlds were black. Something cool ran across my ear, it felt like wind.

1…2…3

**Okay, so this is my first fan fic in a very long time. I read Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse in about a week, loving ever minute. This is how I shall pass my time until the next book comes out. :) Please critique me, I'd love to know how to change my writing, or make it better. 3**

**- Aleah**


	2. Jacob's Rescue

My legs and arms throbbed in pain as my eyes shot open. I gasped for air to fill my lungs, but my frantic gulps had no affect. It felt like there was a rock on my chest. My hands raced up and down my body touching and feeling every inch, looking for the cause of all the pain.

I couldn't stand up, I couldn't breath. Where was Edward, and the rest the Cullen's? Shouldn't they be here? I was become more and more frantic by the minute. I pushed myself off the ground. The area around me was dark, I was still in the meadow. Where was everyone? I dashed towards the trees in front of me. My speed was amazing, it must be one of the gifts. I steadied myself against a tree nearby, my head dizzy with the rush. My legs ached again and before I could stop myself, I was screaming.

I ran again, this time further, and faster. I was leaping over things I couldn't even see. I had no control over my movements as I flew through the forest. My hair whipped around behind me, getting caught on branches and trees, ripping strands and pieces out, but I couldn't stop. If I stopped, the pain would return again.

Suddenly a clearing came into view, I tried to stop myself, but I kept skidding, halting only inches from a cliff. I knew this cliff, this is the cliff I threw myself off of in a weak attempt to hear Edward's voice. I sank to my knees and howled. My legs ached so much. My arms ached and my neck hurt so badly. I felt like someone was twisting needles in the two tine puncture wounds. It felt much larger than just a simple pin prick in my neck, I felt like I had a gaping hole in me, burning, searing and stabbing at my entire being.

I was screaming again, enraged by the fact Edward was not here. The water crashing against the cliffs below drowning out my screams, even to my own ears. I pounded my fists into the ground; pebbles flew in every direction as I continued to pound. My mouth was open, still screaming in pain and rage.

I rolled onto my side, lying on the ground. Throbbing with pain I clutched onto myself as I rolled around, screaming and cursing. I dug my fingernails into my own skin as I cried out. I blinked over and over, but my vision was still clouded over with the same black from before. Something moved in my stomach, causing me to tense up and shriek again.

Rapidly, I felt something warm against my skin. I was no longer on the ground, but I could feel myself flying through the air. I struggled to see through the haze, but I saw nothing but trees whizzing by. I tried to push myself up, to look; but whatever was holding me had my caged within its grasp.

This momentary distraction however, had not stopped the pain. It still swam through my entire body, life fire. It burned so badly, I began screeching in pain again. "Shh, shh Bella, it's alright," the voice whispered into my hair. I knew that voice, but from where? It was so familiar, so comforting. I closed my eyes against the warmth, it felt so nice.

"Keep talking, please," I weakly begged my captor.

"Bella, don't you dare give up on me. I don't care what you are, I will not let you go," the voice hoarsely murmured as we kept running. I felt an abrupt jolt as the journey ended. I heard a crash and a bang as we kept walking. We walked down some steps and I hear something slam. "This is for your own good," the voice mumbled.

I felt something cold on my wrists; it tightened, then the same thing on my ankles. I yowled in pain as the coldness pushed against my wounds. The cold object rattled as I shook with pain. Chains? I was being chained up. I thrashed around helplessly. My previous pain was not gone and my thrashing made it worse. I screamed again, baring my teeth to whoever was watching me. Slowly, I hung my head, letting the chains hold me up.

To my right, light streamed through the window, lighting up only a small portion of my vision. I groaned, trying to strain my eyes to search the dark. Something moved to the left of me, stepping into the light. He was tall, muscular, and a sheen of sweat almost shimmered in the little bit of light.

"Bella," he whispered, stepping forward. His voice was strained, hurt even. He took my face in both of his hands. His hands were so warm against my skin. I brought my eyes to his face and it took all my strength not to scream again. Instead, I gasped roughly.

"J-Jacob," I sputtered, unable to keep my head up for any longer. I realized, he was holding my face up, towards his. He looked at me sadly; his big brown eyes looked like they were wet with tears. "It hurts," I whimpered trying to pull myself towards him. My chains rattled loudly as I stayed back where I was, unable to get any closer.

Jacob inched closer to me, pulling my head into his chest. He sat me on his lap. His arms wrapped around me gently and I could feel the warmth. It felt so good, so soothing. "Just try to sleep Bella, it'll be over soon." His voice was sad, and disappointed. I couldn't think of it now, at least I wasn't alone.

I wrapped myself around his sturdy body, clinging to him. "Please don't go," I begged trying to tilt my head to look at his. He held my face to his chest firmly, stopping any movement from me. I could hear his heartbeat, slow and steady in the dark room.

"I'm not going anywhere Bells, just close your eyes," his voice carried me into a sort of dream world. Pain ripped through me still, and I know I had to be trying to thrash around again. But Jacob held onto my rigidly throughout the night, and even as the pain subsided and I finally fell into a sleep.


	3. Please, just Please!

My eyes shot open and I jerked my body up painfully. I peered around the room slowly. Jacob leaned casually against the staircase, his head slumped downward and his hands crossed against his chest. His chest rose and fell rhythmically.

I looked at his muscles and the constant sheen of sweat that lingered on his skin. My eyes traced the rough beauty of his figure slowly. My body was beginning to burn again, I felt so desiccated. I snarled trying to leap forward. I wanted him, I wanted his blood. My eyes clouded red, in what had to have been a blood induced thirst. Jacob's head snapped up, scrutinizing my behavior. I leapt forward again, with more force, but the chains held me fast against the wall.

"Bella," he sighed pushing him off the stair case. He had on no shirt, like usual, just a pair of sweat pants. His skin was so appealing, so delicious to look at. I wanted it, I wanted to sink my teeth into him and feel his warmth. He took a few steps forward to my delight, but he stopped short of my reach. He was unwilling to come any closer.

I snarled in anger and pulled against my shackles. Where was my vampire strength? Why could I not free myself!? "Let me go!" I screamed in exhaustion. The chains rattled loudly in the otherwise silent basement. Jacob lowered himself down into a crouch. His brows furrowed and he frowned. "Jacob, please let me go, I'm so thirsty," I pleaded, my eyes full of fury, it gave me away. I wanted him.

He shook his head and closed his eyes. "Bella, why did you let them do this to you?" He began pacing back and forth. He stopped and stared at me for a moment, then continued to pace. "Sam is going to kill me for keeping you here, on reservation land, by myself," he prattled on, chastising himself for even laying eyes on me. "And the smell," he continued, "the smell is the worse, you smell like rotten flowers now!" He threw his arms in exasperation.

"Jacob, please, if I don't feed, I'll go crazy. I'll rip these out of the wall and start killing people, please Jacob!" I begged him. I knew the truth though, it didn't matter if I feed now or later, I was going to kill whatever came into my path. I was enraged, I was thirsty, I was a newborn, and I would not stop.

"You think I'm crazy Bella?!" He jumped forward putting his hands hard on my shoulders, pinning me against the wall. I snapped at him trying to get hold of something in this proximity. His body was pressed against mine, and again I felt the burning inside me again. It started in my chest and began to crawl outward. He was whispering now, his face dangerously close to mine. "I know you exist in there somewhere, and I will not let you destroy whatever part of you is left. You are NOT a monster Bells, you're not." He pulled himself away from me in a short backward leap, out of my reach before I could move.

"Jacob, I'm thirsty, please," My body was burning underneath my skin. I scratched vigorously at my hands, but my nails didn't even leave a mark. I moaned and wrapped my arms around myself, sinking onto my knees. A noise was coming from my throat, it was guttural and loud. My face was strained and hard. I was crying, with no tears. Vampires could cry, but it was so painful.

"Jacob," I whispered. "Where are the Cullens, where's Edward?"


	4. Just A Little Test

I'd been chained up for days. Jacob drifted in and out casually watching over me. No one came for me, and from what Jacob hinted to, no one was going to. There was no trace of the Edward and the family; they were all but whispers in the wind. Search parties were roaming around the nearby woods, looking for both the Cullens and myself.

The hunger was driving my crazy. After days of fidgeting and scratching, I finally tore through the skin on my forearm. I tore at the skin just to take my mind off of the thirst. No blood poured out of my wound, no redness rushed to the surface around my gouges. It was just as white and pale as the rest of me. Jacob was due back soon; he stuck to a loose, but repetitive schedule.

I closed my eyes sniffing the air. I could smell faint traces of barbecue sauce on the outside air. Billy must've been using his Stone Age grill. I rattled my chains softly as the burning hit a high level again. The past days had been very, very hard. The thirst was so uncontrollable inside of me; the slightest thought would send me into a bloody rage. I was beginning to recover some self control, mind over matter, as someone once told me. Carlisle could do it as well, from the very start, so could I.

The door creaked open. My heart sped up as I awaited my visitor. To my surprise, it was Sam Uley who stepped into the light. He scrutinized me from a distance, his features hard and angry.

"Sam -," I started to speak, but he held up one hand to silence me. He turned on his heels and stared into the darkness behind him. Jacob had to be there.

"Has she eaten anyone?" His words stung me and I recoiled back against the wall. My chains clinked together causing as Jacob stepping into my vision, watching me. He shook his head and Sam let out a heavy sigh. "Well, I guess that's good." He turned to look at me sharply. "Bella, you are in a very dangerous situation, you were found on reservation land with the _venom_ in you," he spat the word venom out as if it were actually poisonous. "Jacob was very persuasive to the pack, all but begging us to make you his responsibility," he paused for a moment, glancing at Jacob who had moved automatically closer to me. "You can't kill, and you shouldn't even exist, but the Cullens are too far gone for us to even trace their scent to remind them they broke our treaty!" He threw up his arms, exasperated.

I closed my eyes, forcing the images of Edward out of my head. He left me, again, but I would not let it destroy me, not now. "Sam, please. I have no where to go," my eyes pleaded with him. "I can't go home, where is it you'd have me go? I don't even know how to feed properly," I admitted, shamed. I thought it'd be instinct, but my only instinct right now was to hide myself from the two regal men in my presence.

"Bells, we came up with a kinda, plan," Jacob trailed off, glancing at Sam for the go ahead. Sam nodded once. "Your venom, as a vampi-ire," his voice caught as he said vampire, as he said out loud what I really was. "Has no affect on me or anyone in the pack. While no one else is willing to take the risk, I am."

I narrowed my eyes, what was he getting at? "What risk?" I questioned cautiously.

"Of you biting me. To feed, ya' know." He looked at his shoes awkwardly for a moment before looking back up at me. My mouth dropped open, but I quickly closed it and regained my composure.

"No way, never," I shook my head sharply. I would not endanger him, no matter how hungry was. I was better off chained to the wall then get thirsty around Jacob. He took a step forward, extending his arm as if to grasp mine. I pushed myself against the wall and his arm dropped, rejected. "No, no, no. Are you crazy! I'm not going to hurt you!"

I started pulling against the chains again, but to no avail. Jacob was closing in, but only with small steps. "Bella, please, it's the best chance we have to keep you from killing anyone," he took a broad step forward, closing the distance between him and I.

His body was once again pressed against mine. His heart thudded in his chest and his breath was uneven. I cranked my neck upward, forcing myself to look him directly in the eyes. The heat of his body warmed me up quickly, so quickly I felt myself get dizzy. "Jac-," I started, but so quickly he put his finger to my lips to hush me. I looked at Sam, frantically looking for some backup.

"Jacob, maybe a test is in order?" Sam questioned lightly, as not to offend me, I guessed. Sam motioned for Jacob to come towards him. Reluctantly, Jacob pulled himself off of me and lumbered towards Sam. Sam pulled a knife out of his pocket and grabbed for Jacob's hand.

"No!" I screamed desperately, but it was too late, Sam already plunged the knife into Jacob's hand, letting an instant waterfall of blood spill from the wound. Slowly, his hand dripping with stick blood, Jacob turned towards me again, talking deliberate steps.


	5. Thirst

I could feel the blood burning in my nostrils. It smelled rich, like sugar and rust, still the rust smell. I grimaced, this must be a joke. Jacob kept walking forward, slowly, to see my reaction. "Jake, stop, please." My eyes darted back and forth, looking for any escape. My skin started crawling as he stepped very close to me. I could feel his breath on my face and the blood launched all my sense into action. "No," I moaned throwing both hands onto either side of my head, trying to stop the reaction.

Every thought I natural thought I had was to pounce, pounce on him and suck him dry. I couldn't hurt him; I didn't want to be a monster. My body burned fiercely, like a wildfire right underneath the surface. I ached for his blood, for just a taste. I was so hungry. I sank to my knees, digging my nails into my skull. The world spun around me, swaying from side to side. Every time I felt the red start creeping into my vision I had to force it out just as quickly. This was so painful; I don't think I can take much more. "Please, please stop. It hurts," I groaned throwing my head backwards, crashing myself into the wall. My body jerked and twitched furiously as I tried to contain myself.

"Feed her, she obviously doesn't want to feed herself. She can't resist it if it's already in her mouth," there was a long pause, and an exchange of words, too quick for me to hear, but then again, I wasn't listening too closely. "If she doesn't eat, she'll fade into nothing, so you make the choice." Sam's voice was irate and edgy.

Jacob's free hand was on my face, forcing me to look up. I struggled, but moving too freely was a danger just yet. I shook my head begging him not to do it, to just leave me be. He mouthed something to me, I couldn't understand him, but seconds later his warm blood splashed to my lips.

Immediately my body was open to the liquid. It was so warm; I could feel it trail down into my stomach. It was rich and sweet and delicious. I felt a surge go through my body, it threw me off my feet and I landed on my backside. I never once let go of his hand. I licked and sucked at the wound feverously, attempting to commandeer every drop that leaked out of his skin. I felt something different suddenly, it was power. I was more powerful, I had strength.

My head began to spin. Werewolf blood. Jacob. Sam. Jacob's blood. Jacob is a werewolf. Jacob. Edward. Werewolf. Sam is a werewolf. Power. I didn't know what I was thinking, but I put my arms on the ground to stabilize myself. I pushed his hand away looking away from the clean gash. I moaned trying to look around. I couldn't get Jacob's face into focus. I tried to reach for him, but there was nothing but air in my grasp.

I bent forward, letting my head smash onto the floor. This feeling was amazing, it was so, so euphoric. I felt two heavy hands, one on each of my shoulders. There was a rush of air and I was on my feet. "Bella, Bells?" Someone questioned, it had to be Jacob. He was cupping my face in his hand, stroking my cheeks with one long thumb.

"Jake, please, unchain her for a while," Sam ordered turning on his heels to leave. "Don't let her out of your sight," after that snide comment he was gone. Swiftly up the stairs and out of the house before I could say a word.

Jacob was still holding my face in his hands. "Bella, sweetie, are you okay?" My eyes fluttered to his face, and then quickly dropped down. I was humiliated. He sighed loudly and let my face fall. He moved quickly to unlatch the locks that held me, wrapping one arm around me as he did my last ankle. He stood behind me, holding me at the waist, bending awkwardly to whisper into my ear. "You did very well, your self control was amazing," he cooed softly.

The edges of my lips up turned in a small smile. He leaned down once again and planted small, quick kiss on my cheek. My breath caught in my throat, even though I wasn't actually breathing. I smiled again, and he knew it. I was giving him the wrong idea.

"So, uhm, now that I'm a free woman, what am I allowed to do?" I asked softly, treading lightly. He bit the side of his lip while thinking. Surprisingly, I found that extremely cute.

"Well, nothing really. You aren't allowed around people for a while, so you're kinda stuck with me," he grinned suddenly. Oh no.


	6. Sorry

Jacob guided me out of the dreary basement and into his small kitchen. Sam lounged in a chair at the table, nibbling on an apple. He nodded to both of us, and then returned his attention to the apple. "The bathrooms down that hall," Jacob motioned towards a narrow hallway to our left.

I gawked at him. "Are you serious? You honestly think a vampire needs to use the bathroom, Jake, I don't even have to breathe," I reminded him, slightly embarrassed. His laughed shook the little house as I finished speaking.

"Bella," he gasped, "I meant to," another burst of laughter interrupted his speech, "check out how you look." He regained his composure whipping a tear from his eye. "Man, you are hilarious." He chuckled to himself.

Flustered, I stomped down the hallway towards the bathroom, flinging the door open and slamming it closed. The bathroom was cramped and smelled like dirt. I rolled my eyes, the seat was up. I smacked it down, men. They are so disgusting sometimes. I weaved my hand through my hand quickly.

That's when the reflection in the mirror caught my eye. I turned sharply and gasped at my figure. I was curvy, and my hair looked so much healthier. My old clothes were snug on my chest and my jeans were much tighter. I was still the same height, but my frame was slender and toned. My hair, though, my hair was amazing. It was a rich chocolate brown, thick with vibrancy and it trailing to the middle of my back, curling slightly at the ends.

I bent towards the mirror opening my eyes as wide as possible. They were golden, just like Edwards. I smiled momentarily, thinking of our first day in the meadow, his skin sparkling and eyes gleaming. I shook myself mentally, not now.

I bounded out the bathroom, happy with my new image. I beamed at Jacob as I rounded the corner into the kitchen. He grinned at me, shaking his head. He put a bowl of cereal to his lips and sucked at it loudly. It was gone in a matter of seconds.

"Pour cereal, didn't even have a chance." I shook my head in mock grief. He laughed again, whipping a white trail of milk off his upper lip onto the back of his shirt sleeve. He dropped the bowl into the sink and it clattered noisily.

"What are you two planning on doing today?" Sam looked up suddenly, glancing between both our faces. Jacob bit his lip, curious as well.

"Uhm," I piped up quickly. "I was hoping Jacob and I could go someplace and I could ya' know, learn the ropes of uhm, being me?" Dash it all, that was a question, not a statement. I was trying to be forward in my request, I had failed. Sam raised on eye brow precariously, mulling over my idea.

"That wouldn't be such a bad idea, but please, stay out of sight."

Jacob beamed at me. I groaned, he was way too eager about this. I walked towards the front door, Jacob at my heels as we strolled out into the cool morning. I stumbled backwards as the air hit my face. There were so many different smells in the air, it shocked me. I felt a harsh heat on my back; it was Jacob's closed fists pressed against my back to hold me upright. He crinkled his noise when I looked at him.

"Haha," I mocked. "Well, you smell like a garbage dump," I giggled pushing his shoulder lightly. He laughed lightly, nudging me forward, off the porch and into the grass. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, the air smelled clean, but busy just the same. An ocean breeze flowed across the earth lacing salt in and out of the air. Gasoline drifted faintly from Jacob's musty garage and I smelled some roses from down the road a bit. The world smelled oddly beautiful to me. Everything was so, interlaced. Even Jacob smelled okay to me, he sure didn't compare to roses, but he was alright.

"It's what we dogs do, roll around in the garbage." He laughed again, a healthy laugh. His eyes sparkled on even in the dull gray of the mid morning. "So, walking or running? I bet I could beat you in a run," he asked as we began down the gravel path towards the road.

"Walk, for now. I have questions," I glanced at him swiftly, gauging his reaction. His face remained unchanged. He nodded a few times before he relaxed his shoulders and found his pace, matching mine.

We walked down the road for a few minutes in silent, taking in our surroundings. I could feel his stare as we went, burning into my body. Finally, I broke the silence. "So," I began, "Why you?" He looked at me, puzzled. "Why didn't you just release me in a forest somewhere, with a heard of deer or something, you know, wild game?" I clarified.

"Oh, well," he paused momentarily. "Can I be honest?" I nodded. "None of us wanted to baby sit while you were out eating poor little rabbits and things," my mouth dropped, but I closed it quickly. "Plus, hunting is illegal on the rez and we can't explain little animals going missing or turning up dead very easily. We don't want anymore poking around," he added quickly, watching my reaction. "It was Quil's idea to let you bite me. We weighed the pros and cons carefully. In our past, vampires have bitten our kind and we survived unscathed, so we took the chance that I would too."

My mouth formed a silent 'o.' "Okay, so why did you chain me up? You could've just killed me, or at the very least kept me down for a while."

He shrugged his shoulders lightly. "Kill you, right. You're my worst enemy and I still can't kill you Bells," He snorted. "The chains were more of a precaution, if you got out of hand. The pack," he paused again nibbling on his bottom lip momentarily. "The pack would've…killed you if you attacked anyone, myself included," He lifted his gaze to hold mine as we ambled across the wet blacktop

My brows furrowed. "They hate me don't they?" I shuddered at the thought. The boys were so wonderful, with such huge hearts. It must've broken them when I they found out I was turned, they must think I'm a traitor.

"No, well, Paul and Sam are very, very cautious. The rest are just guarded."

"What about you?" I couldn't bite my tongue fast enough.

"Apart from the smell, you're still my little Bella, I love you just the same," he smirked at me, lightening the mood. "Now, uhm, can I ask a question?" I nodded once, narrowing my eyes.

"Why did you do it? Why did you let them do this to you?" His eyes were pleading as he looked at me. We'd stopped walking as I stopped and stared at him. His beautiful brown eyes filled with confusion as he spoke.

For the first time since I was turned, I felt a twinge of regret. I shook it off quickly. "This was what I wanted…to be with," I ended my sentence immediately. "This is what I wanted." I finished curtly. My face softened as I thought intently, picking up the pace again. Jacob walked silently behind me, his hands stuffed in his pockets. "Jake," I murmured; I knew he could hear me. "Where are they?" I turned and faced him, stopping again.

He kept his eyes on the ground, and his hands stayed where they were. "Bella, I don't know," he closed his eyes with a sigh. "We were only out there because it smelled different; maybe it was because they were all in one spot in the open air. But we smelled vampires, and came to investigate. It was so close to reservation land, and well, there was nothing, the scent was gone" he opened his eyes, glancing up at me then quickly looking away. He started walking again, as he passed me I grabbed him by the arm.

"What aren't you telling me?" He tried to shrug me off, but my grip was steel on him. I narrowed my eyes into slits as his eyes darted around quickly, searching for an escape. "Tell me," I growled.

"There was blood Bella! You're blood! All over the grass! I thought they killed you!" He blurted out ripping himself away from me, turning away. Shock rippled through me. I realized what he had to have thought when he found that, that much of my blood. I shook my head silently. My face contorted as it would have if I was crying, but no tears came.

I reached forward, touching my hand to his. It was searing hot against my cool, hard skin. "Jake," I whispered. He didn't turn around, he just stood, somewhat slumped over, facing the forest to the side of the road. I took a step forward, uncertain of myself; I wrapped my arms around him.

It must've looked very odd to anyone passing by. I was hugging Jacob from behind as he stared blankly into the forest, lost in his own thoughts. I was still dwarfed by his height, even now. His body wiggled underneath mine and I thought it was my cue to let go. Defeated, I let my arms fall.

Jacob caught them both quickly, pulling them back to his body. "Bella," he murmured. His body relaxed slightly. After a few long moments, he slowly released his grip and I stepped back. He twisted himself around to face me again, very close. "I'm sorry," I could feel his warm breath on my face, it tickled. "It was very hard for me to see that," he closed his eyes again, face contorted in pain. Instinctively my hand shot to his cheek, soothing it gently. He leaned into it and his hand covered mine. His lips were almost upturned in a smile. He opened his eyes and stared straight into mine. My body fluttered, I could feel myself get imaginary butterflies as he watched me.

I smiled nervously as he watched me, my hand still cupped to his face. His face smoldered just beneath the surface. I tugged my hand down slightly. He blinked suddenly as if he'd forgotten. His face turned a light shade of pink and he released my hand quickly. We both laughed awkwardly. My smile faded swiftly. "I'm sorry you had to see that," I looked at the pavement silently.

"Hey, it's okay. At least you're not gone, completely," there was a sad humor in his voice. He couldn't say at least I wasn't dead. I was dead. My heart couldn't even flutter at his closeness and my cheeks would never turn that dark cherry color again. My human personality was just like leaves falling soundlessly off of the trees around us, scattered father and farther as time went on.

**a/n: So I got a little more into details towards the end, sue me. I'd rather drown myself in this story then deal with my own life. xD Thank you for the reviews, they make me post faster, or something like that. To some of the questions, I'm not giving everything away in the beginning, things will be a mystery for a while. I don't want to spill it all so soon. Also, I really have no idea what the mystery is yet, I just write and go. 3**


	7. Very Sweaty, Muscular & Naked

We walked in silence until we reached the cliffs. Salty air assaulted my nostrils fiercely as we got closer and closer to the sharp edge. A wash of old memories flooded my thoughts. The first time I was here alone, I jumped off this cliff. The second time was so recently, I recalled it so much more vividly. I was in so much agony, if it was possible for me to kill myself on the rocks below, I would have.

Jacob cleared his throat, knowingly. "So, you wanna learn stuff?" He smiled gracefully as he pulled me away from my own thoughts. I nodded eagerly. "Well, run." He spread his arm wide toward the forest beside us. "I'll run with you," and in the same moment he stripped off his shirt and threw off his shoes. I watched him skeptically, waiting for his change. Finally, after he sank down into a crouching stance I watched his body shimmer under his skin. Before I even blinked he was on all fours and sprinting towards the forest.

I took a step forward, running after him. The world blurred around me and I skid to stop a few feet from him, dizzy from the initial thrust. Jacob started running again, disappearing into the forest in front of me. I threw myself forward, jolting my body with immense speed. My instincts took over quickly as my body flew through the maze of the forest.

I could see rocks in front of my and as I came closer I leapt without a thought. I dodged trees in my path and weaved in and out of the dense undergrowth. I couldn't see Jacob, but I could smell him. It felt like a line in front of me, and I was following that line. It was hard because the scent burned my nose as I dashed around.

He turned sharply, only seconds ahead of me and I started turning as well. I dug my heels into the ground and touched my fingers to the soft, wet ground and then I was off again, right on his tail. Suddenly, in a cluster of trees in our path, I lost sight of him.

I stopped, puzzled. Abruptly something hard hit my shoulder knocking me into a tree. The tree cracked audibly under the force. I snarled, hurling myself up onto my feet. I scanned the area looking for my opponent. Before I could turn around something hit me in the legs, and I flew through the air landing on my back.

I was up in seconds, crouched low to the ground, snarling and spitting. I was angry, ready to fight. My inherited instincts taking over as my eyes slowly washed over with red. I blinked rapidly, trying to clear my vision, but the red was there to stay.

I heard a twig snap behind me and I whirled around in time to dodge a large dark brown animal launch itself at me. It was Jacob, attacking me. He brought me out here to kill me! I roared in anger and grabbed for his back leg as he sailed through the air. I caught it and pulled around in a circle, heaving him into a tree.

He quickly regained himself and circled my, snarling. Salvia dripped from his teeth as he growled. Swiftly he threw himself at me and I threw my arms up in front of my body. His mouth was wide in the air, but when he landed on me it was closed. Fool, I thought. I sprang him up with all the force I had in my body and pushed myself on top of him. I snapped my teeth at him furiously.

I raised on of my arms to bring it down on him, but as I did I felt a bump below me and my knees hit the ground. I looked down, my arm still above my head. It was Jacob, the flesh and blood human Jacob, pinned beneath me, his hands up in surrender.

"Bella, Bella stop! It's me, it's Jacob!" He yelled desperately at me. "It was training, it wasn't serious. Slowly, I lowered my hand, eyeing him suspiciously. I narrowed my eyes at him, not daring to move an inch. Red faded from my eyes as his face pleaded with mine.

After a few moments he spoke. "Bells, I know this is new to you and all, but can you please get off me, I'm kinda," he coughed and looked down. I sprang backward looking at him in horror. He was up in a few seconds.

I was face to face with a very naked Jacob. A very sweaty, muscular and naked Jacob.


	8. Rage

My mouth fell open in a gasp. I whirled around throwing my hand over my mouth to stifle a scream. I just more of Jacob then I ever need see. My hand still over my mouth, I found myself shaking my head silently. I could hear a rush of air behind me; I assumed it was Jacob running back to get his clothes.

A minute or so passed and I finally relaxed and let myself lean against a tree nearby. Jacob strolled into the clearing – his bottom half clothed – smiling smugly. I shook my head in disbelief. "Are you seriously smiling about that!?" I screamed.

He chuckled to himself. "You forget Bella, I'm still vying for your heart, I never stopped," my mouth fell open again; I closed it quickly. "This little mishap could only play in my favor," he laughed again. My shock was quickly replaced by anger.

"Jacob Black! You are a disgusting little pervert!" I shrieked as loudly as possible. I reached forward to shove him as hard as I could, but something tingled in my hand and fingers. Everything from my forearm to my fingers began to blister with heat. "Oh," I gasped as a small ball formed in the palm of my hand.

It was clear with only the slightest hue of red, it glistened in what little light the forest yielded to us and it was growing bigger. I shot a panicked glance at Jacob who was stepping back a few feet at a time, horror burning in his eyes. He looked up, oblivious to the fact I had no idea what was going on either. His demeanor changed instantly as our eyes locked. He took a small step forward, "Bella," he said, anxiety lacing his voice.

I braced my forearm as the weight of the ball pulled me downward. It was so hot the leaves on the ground twitched and began curling up slowly under the heat. "Throw it!" Jacob yelled helplessly, as he watched the ball grow bigger than an average globe of the world.

I did exactly as he said. I pulled both my arms back and spun forward hurling the ball out of my hand. It sailed in a fast straight line, colliding with a thick pine tree a few hundred feet away. The crash was deafening, and slivers of wood and dirty quickly enveloped the small clearing. I covered my face instinctively, and in the same moment Jacob had his arms wrapped around me, shielding my body from the explosion, even though I was the indestructible one.

After a few seconds he released me and we both straightened up, looking at the path the orb traveled. The cloud of dust settled eventually leaving us to gawk. The pine tree was laying sideways, a splintered break towards the bottom of the trunk. The rest of the large tree lay across the other trees surrounded that had surrounded it -unable to hit the ground properly - it was suspended above the forest.

"Are you okay?" Jacob whispered, not taking his eyes off the destruction before us.

"Yes," I said weakly. My head spun as I stood there. What just happened?

"Bella, we need to get you to Sam…he'll know what to do," he tugged at my wrist lightly. I let him guide me through the forest, still dazed by what had happened.

----

Sam, Paul, Quil, Embry, Jacob and myself all stuffed into Jacob's tiny kitchen was not working out well. Jacob's pacing was basically him taking two steps in one direction then turning around again. Sam sat in a chair at the circular table, leaned forward in his chair, eye brows furrowed in though. Quil and Embry stood side by side against the counter casually chatting and occasionally nudging or hitting one another, and Paul sat leisurely in a chair next to Sam, gnawing on an apple. I put my back against the doorframe leading into the hallway, watching everyone anxiously.

My eyes focused on Jacob, who continued pacing. His hand was to his chin as he walked, mumbling quietly to himself. Every once in a while he'd stop abruptly, look at Sam, shake his head then start pacing again.

"So tell me again, what exactly were you doing Bella?" Sam looked at me, trying to put the puzzle pieces together. He must've asked us that at least three times already, between Jacob and me.

I sighed. "I was mad at Jacob for thinking his uh," I paused flickering my eyes to each of the male faces, uneasy about talking about such things. "Indecent exposure would _help_ his chances with me," I snorted in disgust once again. "So I reached out to hit him, and I felt my arm get incredibly hot, then this ball started forming. It was like watching someone roll a snowball, getting bigger and bigger."

Jacob stopped and threw his hands in the air, "of course!" He yelled. I jumped at the sound of his voice. He closed the gap between us quickly, putting both his rough hands on my shoulders. He bent a bit so he could look at me directly. "Bella, you remember how some of the Cullens had those talents?" He picked his words carefully, analyzing my reaction as he went on. I nodded. "That could be your power; you got it from their venom!" Jacob let out a sigh of relief as he concluded it wasn't life – or death – threatening to me.

I narrowed my eyes. Cullens. Edward. "You mean to tell me, that they gave me this _talent_," I spat the word out violently, "and left me here to deal with it?" I was growing angry again. I've avoided thinking about them as much as possible, but now it was _impossible_ not to.

"Now, Bella wait," Jacob started. He sounded as if he were about to defend them, his enemies! How ridiculous. He planted himself firmly in front of me as I took a step forward. I rolled my eyes and crushed my arm into his chest pushing him aside.

I held him there for a moment, staring at him. His eyes were confused. "Just don't," I snarled. I pushed past him quickly and ran out of the door without a backward glance. The fresh air assaulted my nostrils for the second time today, but the first time was much more pleasant. The waves were crashing against the cliffs; I could hear them – even this far away.

I started running, running towards the cliffs. The air was saturated with sea salt, burning my eyes as I ran. I didn't slow down until I reached the clearing, digging my heels into gravel only feet away from the drop off. I could see the water turn white as it curled before hitting the rocks, spraying water directly up into the air.

Edward was gone, again. He left me, again. He changed me into this, this monster and left me alone with it. I wanted to be sad right now, but all I felt was anger. Immense, bubbling, **hot** anger. I glanced at my hand, this time expecting what was coming. I could see the ball building in my hand, as I could feel my anger building.

I didn't wait for it to grow any bigger; I threw it with all my strength into the waters below. Water blew up in to the air as the orb hit the surface; steam furrowing up in all directions. Another ball starting in my right hand, then again in left. I kept throwing them into the water, and the water kept consuming all I gave to it. I screamed in agony and threw another, then another. One explosion after another hit the water, spewing water everywhere below me, but I didn't stop.

My arms burning and my head spun as the orbs continued forming, quicker and quicker. Edward, Edward left me again. My face contorted in tearless sobs. My screams of rage were beginning to tangle with snarls of pain. I held out both my hands, palms up. Two balls started forming at once, searing my forearm and fingers. I closed my eyes willing them to grow faster.

All at once I pushed my hands together smashing the orbs together. Then with every ounce of strength I had I threw the ball far out into the shoreline. It hit the water with a boom as I fell to my knees. Boiling water launched into the air before falling back into the ocean. I screamed one last time; the ocean had swallowed all the anger I had, replacing me with sadness.

**Hey guys, thank you for all the reviews. Also, if you see any mistakes, such as in my last chapter about Jacob's wolf color, please bring it to my attention. I lent my copy of Eclipse to a friend, and the only other book I own is Twilight. xD. So just let me know & I'll correct it right away. As for those asking about Edward returning, I'm not sure. Oh, and the next chapter is Jacob POV. :)**


	9. Sleepless Sleep

**Jacob POV**

Her arm crushed into my chest and I felt the wall give a little underneath my weight. Damn she was strong. I looked at her utterly confused. Her eyes darkened as she stared at me, hard and uncaring. "Just don't," was the last thing I heard before she was out the door.

I turned to run after her, but thought better of it. I'd stay way behind. I turned to the guys, Sam in particular. "Maybe if she's angry at them, it's better?" I questioned nervously. Sam nodded curtly towards the door, nodding in agreement and simultaneously telling me I needed to go after her.

The Cullens didn't leave on their own. Something big, something powerful _took _them out of Forks. We could smell the outsiders from miles away, their scent was strong and warm in the air. I was able to pick Edwards scent out immediately, following it into the clearing, hoping Bella was with him. Instead, I found the foreign scent and his scent mingled together in the same area where that grass was stained with Bella's blood. Foolishly, I thought Edward lost a fight and Bella was killed. My brothers searched the area and found that the strange vampires had come with a match to each and every one of the Cullens. They all had someone to fight, and they all fought from the looks of the area.

I can't tell Bella this, she'll never let go of him. I know it's selfish of me, but it doesn't matter. Edward should've fought harder; he should've been there for her. He should have never done it to begin with! Fury rose to the surface as I chased after Bella, at a much slower speed than usual. Her scent was easy to follow, even as a vampire she still smelled of flowers. She was better off if she didn't know, at least now she has a chance; and so do I.

I stopped at the tree line, far away from her. She was angry, she was screaming. My heart ached, I wanted to reach out and pull her into me, to comfort her. Her hands were glowing, and I realized what she was doing. She was throwing those energy orbs into the water, one after another after another. I could hear her screaming and snarling, still.

After a while, I saw her sink to her knees. Her body shook violently; she looked like she was crying. I sprinted up to her – not wasting a moment – I wrapped my arms around her and scooped her into my chest. She was so very cold against my bare chest.

"Shh, sweetheart, shh. You'll be okay." I cooed in her ear as her body shook in my arms. Her eyes were shut tightly and her face was tight and contorted. I pulled her closer to me, kissing her forehead. "You'll be okay, you're never going to be alone again," I whispered into her skin. "I love you," I murmured. I'm sure she heard me, but there was no response.

I pushed myself up into a standing position, still cradling her in my arms. Slowly, I walked back to my house. She never moved and inch, but her face relaxed. I knew she wasn't asleep, she could never sleep. She just needed to rest, to think. My poor Bella, she was such a mess.

I pushed open the door and as I entered four sets of eyes caught mine. I nodded once and turned to go to my room.

I laid Bella down softly on my bed, then turned around and shut the door. I positioned myself behind her and wrapped a blanket around us. I draped my arms over her small – but toned – body protectively. I took a deep breath, breathing in her new, different scent. It still burned my nose a bit, but not so much as before.

I felt her body relax beneath mine after a few minutes, aware of where she was. She wasn't asleep, but she wasn't awake either. She was in her mind, fighting with her pain. I would not leave her to this battle alone; I will stay with for as long as she needed me too. I would fight for Bella, against anything and everyone. Slowly, my vision started getting hazy, as I drifted in and out of consciousness, with an angel in my arms.


	10. Better Than Nothing

My eyes fluttered open. My rest was limited, because I could not drift away when I wanted to sleep. I was in between sleep and consciousness; I was in my own twilight. My body felt warm and heavy at the time. I scooted my body upward the teensiest bit to crane my neck around the room. My lips upturned in a silent smile as my eyes fell on Jacob, arms draped over my body as he snored lightly. His face was serene as he slept, lips slightly parted as little bursts of noise escaped his chest.

I wiggled my legs a little bit and realized he had wrapped his legs around mine. I stifled a giggle, he was so protective. I inhaled deeply, letting the air run coolly through my nostrils. Jacob's scent burned me little now; he smelled more like forest than anything else. I could smell popcorn wafting in from the other parts of the house and I could hear the pack hooting and yelling while watching TV.

I closed my eyes and reflected on what had happened. Edward – my heart stung as I thought his name – was gone. My angel, my Greek God and savior – had left me once again. I played with the ideas in my head, as to why he left me. Perhaps he couldn't live with himself? Maybe my blood was too much for them, and after it was spilled they _had _to leave so they didn't kill me before my change was over. Or possibly, my screaming drove them all mad. I closed my eyes tighter than before, creasing my forehead. It hurts so badly, to think about them. I wouldn't let myself become a wreck, not this time. I could not waste months of my life mourning over someone who seemed not to care anymore. I refused to let myself crumble again, I simply refused.

Jacob stirred behind me, pulling me closer to his warm, bare skin. Something inside me fluttered as his breath slid across the back of my neck. "Jake, Jacob?" I whispered loudly, moving my body a little against his, trying to nudge him awake. He grunted. "Jake!" I hissed, twisting my body around in his grip. "Jacob Black, you wake up this instant or I'm cutting your tail off!" I screeched in his ear.

He shot straight up, eyes wide and panicked. He had one arm wrapped around my waist still and he was glancing around the room quickly. Just then four – also wide eyed – boys barged into the room through the little door. Quil and Embry's mouth hung open in a silent 'o,' then before anyone could even react they were doubled over in laughter.

"Oh. My. God." Embry gasped for breath as he spoke, on his knees from the laughter. "Way to go Jake!" He howled. I cocked my head sideways, confused. I felt Jacob slowly untangle his arm from my body. I turned to look at him and his cheeks were a deep shade of pink. Then I understood.

"Shut up you guys," he mumbled, intently studying the patterns on the bed spread.

I threw myself out of the bed and was in front of the boys in an instant. I grabbed Quil by his ear and pulled him off the ground. "You are a disgusting little pervert, and you should be hit in the face with a newspaper you little flea bag," I hissed in his ear as I pushed my way through the other three men. I pulled him – by his ear – through the house and to the front door. He shrieked in pain as I threw him off the front porch and onto the wet gravel.

I turned around as he started brushing himself off. "Which one of you are next?" I growled. Paul and Embry squeaked passed me silently, taking their place beside Quil. Sam put his hands up in mock defeat.

"Nice job there, I couldn't have said it better myself," he chuckled, excusing himself from the house. I closed the door behind him, smiling a little. I turned around and Jacob stood there, awkwardly, his cheeks still warm and red. He looked…exceedingly appetizing just then.

"Sorry," he muttered.

"It's no problem," I chirped, already in a better mood. I heard a low growling noise coming from his waist. "Jacob are you growling at me --," I stopped, realizing something suddenly. "Oh! You're hungry, you're stomach is growling!" I giggled uncontrollably as he covered his stomach self consciously, muttering about 'stupid leech hearing.'

Instinctively I wandered towards the kitchen, rummaging through the cupboards, searching for food. I found some noodles and sauce, and decided on spaghetti with some garlic bread for Jacob and Billy's dinner. Billy would have to come home sometime, and he'd have to eat as well.

They didn't have any garlic bread, so I had to get creative and throw some butter and garlic powder on toasted pieces of Italian bread. Jacob never took his eyes off me, even as I stirred the noodles. Sometimes he'd pipe up and we'd make some small talk for a few moments.

I poked around in his freezer until I found some ground beef. I tossed it in the microwave on high for about 15 minutes, waiting for it to thaw. I flopped into the folding chair next to Jacob. He froze and began staring at the table, inspecting every inch in front of him.

"Jake," I startled him as he looked up, "what is wrong with you? Why are you acting so skittish?" I paused, "I'm not going to hurt you," my voice was full of hurt as I spoke.

His eyes widened in shock and he started speaking immediately. "Bella, no it's not that, don't ever think that," he stumbled over his words and he was talking much too quickly. He threw his hand onto mine, and started talking again, "Bella, I'm in love with you." He blurted out.

I stared, shocked. His cheeks flushed soundlessly as he watched me. I opened my mouth to speak, but closed it again, not knowing what to say. His eyes pleaded with mine. "Jake," I started, quietly. "I l-love you too, but just, not in that way. Not right now," I let my eyes fall to the linoleium floor.

He squeezed my hand tightly, "it's better than nothing," he smiled reassuringly.


	11. Innocent Humanity

Billy pushed himself through the front door loudly, interrupting Jacob's and my somewhat intimate moment. He gave me a curt nod before turning into the living room, obviously displeased with my presence in his house. I sighed heavily as I pushed myself up and away from the table in one continuous movement. "I'm going to go for a walk," but before I could turn Jacob caught my wrist solidly.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You can't go alone, Sam's rules," his eyebrows jutted up, sympathetically. "I'll make Billy's plate and then I'll meet you out front," he released me wrist as he pulled himself out of the chair. I turned to walk out of the door, but before I could take more than a few steps I heard Jacob called "don't try to run anywhere, I'll catch you."

I rolled my eyes as I stepped out into the cold night air. A car sped by, kicking up water on the street ahead of me. I could hear the music flowing out of the car as it disappeared into the night.

_Oh  
I say I did and always searching  
You can't fuck with fate  
So, instead you'll taste my pain._

The words struck me in the chest as they washed over me. I took a few steps as I replayed the lyrics in my head, echoing back and forth in my head. Behind me, Jacob stepped out of the small house. He was as my side in no time, as I shook off the feeling the music had given me. Things had a whole new meaning now that I was a vampire.

Jacob put his hand on the small of my back as we walked, his heat warming me up steadily. "So where are we heading?" He questioned, jumping a head of me a little. I giggled.

"I don't know, why don't you tell me?" The excitement in his eyes was unmistakable, this was MY Jacob. He babbled aimlessly as we walked, talking about how Quil and Embry were dealing with being werewolves, and how Sam was planning on proposing to Emily soon. The most unbelievable part was when I realized I was enjoying myself. I giggled and laughed as he imitated his brothers, making faces and sounds shamelessly in the night.

"So Sam had to break them apart, then out comes Leah with a rolled up newspaper, and she just up and smacks Quil in the face with it," he gasped for breath, stopping to rest his hands on his knees, doubled over in laughter. "That's not even the best part, after she hits him, she screams 'bad dog!' and walks right back into the house. None of us had any idea what just happened, and poor Quil," he paused again, hooting and hollering in laughter as we stood in the middle of the street. "Poor Quil didn't know what to do with himself, he just stood there muttering about," he coughed abruptly. "Well, just muttering about female werewolves," he smiled at me impishly, trying to hide his masculine nature in front of a lady.

I laughed, truly laughed at his story. He smiled along with me, placing his hand again on my back as we began walking again. "That's hilarious," I managed to choke out through my hysteric laughter. Slowly, both him and I calmed down and managed to keep our antics down to a minimum as we ambled along the dark streets of La Push.

"Bella?" He asked lightly. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure you can." I flashed a toothy grin at him as he peered at me.

"What is it like, to want blood?" His question shocked me. My head whirled. I couldn't talk to him about this, it was dirty; my desire for blood. It wasn't something to be proud of; it was something I needed to hide from everyone close to me. Speaking of it to Jacob – of all people – just made it more real.

I opened my mouth once, only to shut it. We took a few steps in silence as I rearranged my thoughts. "Do you know what really rich, melted, warm chocolate tastes like?" I countered, cautiously. I peeked at him pathetically, gauging his reaction.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure I've tasted it at one time or another," he answered, biting his lip. "So you mean," he paused. "Blood tastes like sugary chocolate to you?" I nodded grimly.

"I know, I'm disgusting," I murmured. He caught my forearm in his iron grasp once again. He pulled me to face him; making himself level with me. His eyes smoldered a dark brown – even in the dark – I could see light dancing off his irises.

"Don't you ever say that again. You are not disgusting Bella," he shook my arm slightly. "I'm just curious and have a lot of questions about you, you're almost a whole new person now," his voice grew low as he spoke, as he contemplated something unspoken.

"Oh Jake!" I threw myself into his unyielding chest, wrapping my arms around him. My whole body shuddered as he pulled me closer into him. "I'm so sorry," I wailed, just like a little child.

"Hush, hush. You haven't done anything wrong Bells," he smoothed out my hair as he spoke into my skin. His breath filled my nostrils and the burning was gone, he smelled purely of forest and fresh dirt. It was refreshing amongst the chaos I usually inhaled.

"I'm so, so sorry," I cried into his chest. I wasn't actually crying, but my body was shaking with dry sobs as we stood there. Everything was so messed up; it was never supposed to be like this. Edward was supposed to be with me through this. This was hurting Jacob as much as it was hurting me, it wasn't fair.

I pushed myself away from his chest roughly, putting a small distance between us. His arms created a cage around me as I pushed harder against his embrace. "No, no no," I yelled. "This isn't right, I won't do this to you," I screamed even louder, thrusting my body through his arms, freeing myself.

I stumbled backwards – losing my balance momentarily – but regaining it quickly. Jacob was much quicker than I was, as he grabbed my shoulders and pulled my close to him. I struggled against his hold while he looked straight at me. His face softened for a moment, as we locked eyes.

Suddenly I felt his warm – almost fiery – lips against my cool ones. He crushed himself into my, pulling my body into his; locking me into another embrace as he kissed me hungrily. I gasped, astonished. As my lips parted his tongue eagerly explored my mouth. "No!" I mumbled against his lips, he could hit my venom coated fangs, I could kill him.

With all the strength I had, I hit his chest with two balled up fists; knocking him backward into the trees. He disappeared from before me quickly and quietly; seconds later there was a snap in the darkness that lay to the side of the road. An almost silent thud followed the snap. What had I done?

"Jacob?!" I yelled frantically, speeding into the forest. My vision immediately spotted his sluggish movements in front of me. He hit a tree a few feet off of the road, shattering its base. He lay in a lump on the mossy forest floor, moving every few moments, trying to gather himself. I was at his side instantly, grabbing his shoulders to pull him upright. "Jake, Jake, please open your eyes." I pleaded, holding his head up.

His eyes fluttered open. I sighed in relief. My mistake flooded my mind in seconds. My venom had no effect on him, that's how I was able to feed on him. He was in no real danger, it was just a kiss. "I'm so sorry, I thought . . . I thought I could hurt you with my . . . my venom." I hung my head, ashamed, both arms still holding Jacob.

Unexpectedly he pulled me into him, once again. My head fell onto his chest without a fight as he covered my small body with his arms. "I'm so sorry," I whispered into his skin. His chest rose shakily as he spoke.

"Bella, I'm fine," he took a deep – unsteady – breath. "You just hit the right spot, you knocked the wind clean out of me," he chuckled, his breath becoming a little more even. "Don't be upset with me, it was the only day I could get you to shut up about hurting me – before. Stop trying to be so selfless," he tightened his grip on my shoulders.

"Jake, how can I pull you into this mess? A mess I made myself, it's not fair . . ." I trailed off quietly; listening to his heart beat. I could hear the blood rushing though his veins, rhythmically.

"You think if I didn't want to be here, I would be? You just don't understand, I love you more than anyone. I'd die before letting you get hurt. Vampire or not, your stench is almost gone and I'm willing to make every sacrifice I can make, to take care of you," he paused, grinning in the dark – but he was far from finished. "I will let you feed of off me for the rest of eternity if it meant you could hold onto the shred of innocent humanity you have. I will _never_ leave your side Bella, whether you're stronger than me or not, you are my responsibility. I will fight anyone and everyone to defend you, please don't ever forget that." He kissed the top of my head tenderly.

I snuggled into his chest, tracing his muscles lightly. "Thank you," I murmured. I closed my eyes and listening to the sudden bursts of blood whoosh through his body. If only he knew the sadistic, dirty thoughts flying through my head as I listening to his 'chocolaty' blood. A faint burning flared up in my throat, and I felt my mouth begin salivating with saliva.

Nothing would ruin this moment, not even my thirst. I clung to him helplessly. "Jake . . ." He rubbed my arm in response. Oh God no. "I'm thirsty," I whispered, as quietly as possible. I felt Jacob go ridged underneath my body. The burning moved to my lips, it felt like hot coals in my mouth – surrounded by poisonous venom. I felt another heartbeat come and go by my mouth.


	12. Next Time, Not The Neck

**Jacob POV**

She sighed and her cool breath tingled along my abdomen. It felt so amazing, having her in my arms. She was the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen when she was human, and now? Now she was simply breathtaking. Her smell was washing away; the burning was almost completely gone now. She smelled faintly of flowers.

I felt her body stiffen in my embrace as she spoke. "Jake," her voice was barely a whisper, "I'm thirsty." She shut her eyes tightly. It was my turn to go ridged. She had just fed not too long ago, could her thirst really build up that quickly? Bella pushed herself up, easily breaking my grasp on her, standing roughly – her eyes still closed.

She hummed to herself; an unfamiliar tune touched my ears as she took a few steps away from me. I pulled myself off the ground and to my feet quickly, reaching for her sleeve. She yanked it away before I could grab her, not bothering to open her eyes.

"Bella," I breathed. I took a step forward, offset by her step back. "Bella, please, don't be afraid." She was scared, I could smell it. She hummed louder and her body jerked sideways – she was about to run. I flung myself forward wrapping my arms around her tightly, using all the strength I had to hold her there.

"Jacob," she snarled, snapping her teeth at me from over her shoulder. "Let me go, you're not a meal," she growled audibly. She was pushing her thirst back, just long enough to get away from me.

"I'm the _only_ way the pack will let you live! You have to Bells; I'm the only food for you! You already know it won't kill me; I'm stronger than you think," my words were hurried in my attempt to cage her longer in my arms. Her feeble struggle paused, as she considered my words.

"So," her jaw was clenched as she spoke and her eyes were a dark color – almost black. "Sam knows this?" I nodded. "Does he approve?"

"Yes. No one in the pack wants to hurt you, that's why we searched for an answer besides tearing you apart while you were chained up; we don't want you dead," I loosened my grip on her body, and I felt her relax for a moment, but she went stiff seconds later.

"Does it hurt when I bite you?" Her eyes were shut tight once again, her face contorted with questions – questions that had no answers good enough for her.

"Nah, not too bad; it's just like being poked with a fork," I lied quickly.

"What do **you** think about it?" Her eyes were wide now, darting between my arms and my face. Her irises were dark with barely any trace of the chocolate brown I used to get lost in, or the dark – rich – amber eyes I was falling in love with all over again. The battle inside of her rang in her words – and the decision rested on my answer.

"I think I'm willing to do anything to keep you around, I still owe you a lifetime of servitude," my smile was genuine, even though I didn't feel it quite reach up to my eyes.

"Please forgive me," she whispered. Before I could move she flipped her body within my embrace and had her cool lips to the hollow point of my neck. I felt my skin rip and give away as her teeth sunk into me. The coolness disappeared rapidly as I felt a fire on my shoulders, spreading to my arm and the crown of my head. She crushed her body against mine and my arms fell limp at my sides.

She was the only thing holding me up and my head spun. Her body was cold against mine, despite the fire I felt throughout me. My knees gave up as another minute passed, her bite on my neck the only thing holding me upright. I weakly pressed my hands against her stomach. My vision blurred and I felt like I was falling, but couldn't be sure if I really was.

I think I felt Bella pull away from me, because the coolness vanished. The burning – however – remained as I braced myself against the tree behind me. My palms sinking into the moss covered bark. Faintly, I could see Bella looming in front of me, red splotches dotting her mouth. My stomach lurched.

The world in front of my slowed from it's swaying, and I managed to focus my eyes long enough to see Bella swipe her sleeve over her mouth – washing away any traces of my blood. My hand made its way to my neck, and I for the first time I felt the blood running down my shirt and back. My clothing clung to my body, held in place by my sticky, hot blood. I heard myself moan, but it sounded more like an echo.

"Jake?! Jacob!?" Bella's frantic voice was the last thing I heard as I slid down, my back scraping along the tree. I felt the wet moss once more as my body made contact with the ground. I felt dizzy, but not dead. I was nearly indestructible; the venom in my system would no sooner enter my system then be attacked by my white blood cells. I shut my eyes, blocking out the swinging world in front of me – which happened to be making me nauseous.

"Just give me a sec," I choked out, regretting my words. I threw my hand over my mouth as I felt the contents of my stomach lurch forward again. I threw my body into the moss to the side of me as another lurched pushed the chunks and liquid out of my body and onto the ground in front of me. I opened my eyes momentarily – another mistake. I saw blood dripping off my shoulders and neck into the pile of throw up. Mixing and mingling with the chewed food and soda – the image caused another pitch in my body and again I threw up into the moss.

More carefully this time, I wiped the puke off my mouth and pulled myself away from the now steaming mess before me. Bella was at my side, stroking my hair, pulling it away from the sheen of sweat on my face. Her hand was moving up and down my back – the coolness was comforting. She was mumbling apologizes very quickly.

I attempted to free myself of my shirt, pulling it almost all the way off before my range of motion ceased – the wound on my shoulder stung as I moved. I hissed in pain, stopping mid-movement. Bella took over for me, pulling my shirt the rest of the way off of me and tossing it away into the distance. I rested my head against her shoulder and closed me eyes. I took deep and even breaths, regaining my strength and demeanor steadily.

"Bella," I whispered, "next time, not the neck," her body quivered under mine – in agreement. She continued to run her delicate hands through my hair as the night wrapped itself around us. She hummed to me as I floated in and out of a much needed sleep; with my angel at my side.


	13. My Name in Her Voice

**Jacob POV**

I struggled to open my eyes. I could feel Bella next to me, the only indication of her presence was her even breathing – even that wasn't necessary. Her hand was resting on my head, fingers entwined in my hair. The world finally came into focus and I could see what looked like traces of sun streaming through the blanket of trees above.

I sat upright, Bella adjusting herself around me. "Morning sleeping beauty," her smile amazed me. Her beauty seemed to knock the wind out of me. I stumbled over my words as I spoke.

"G-good morning," I used my forearm to wipe the sheen of sweat on my forehead. It was common with werewolves, to sweat so much. Her scent assaulted my nostrils as I took a deep breath.

Her eyes darted around quickly as her body tensed up. She exhaled sharply. "Company," her voice was almost a hum when she spoke. Not soon after I heard the far off ruffling of leaves behind us. A twig snapped and the ruffling came closer, faster.

Instinctively I pulled her closer to me, not being able to detect a scent just yet. The breeze pushed past my face in the wrong direction, skewing any ability I had to identify who was coming towards us. I twisted my body – pulling both of up into an about face – and came face to face with Quil, Embry and Sam.

All of them on all fours, growling and snarling at us. I barked a growl back, pushing Bella behind me. I heard her sharp intake of breath as Sam took a step forward, baring his teeth at us. "We're fine," I snapped, crouching in front of him. Saliva hung loosely from his flukes – dripping now and then into the moss as we stared at each other.

Sam's growling grew louder as I inched forward – still crouching. "Sam, I'm fine, we're fine," His hair was on end, causing chaotic hackles on his muscled, broad back. "We just lost track of time," my voice was even, authoritative.

His ears went back slowly, as Quil and Embry lowered their growling to a dull buzz. Bella exhaled behind me – her breath reached my skin momentarily – sending chills down my spine. I felt her rest her hand on my shoulder as she took a broad step – placing herself in front of me.

"Bella!" I snapped. They would rip her apart. She kneeled, extending her hand towards Sam. "Bella, don't!" I yelped, reaching forward. Her free hand flew up – locking my wrist in place. She shook her head silently, never tearing her gaze away from Sam's.

Her hand rested in a patch of sunlight, glistening like diamonds, palm up. Sam's hackles rose quietly as her hand stopped inches before his muzzle. His nostrils moved quietly as he took in her scent. The moss hissed as he put one paw forward, bringing his head into her hand.

I sighed, relieved. Bella was petting him gently as the rest of us stood in silence. Sam's tail wiggled uncontrollably and a smile erupted over him – even wolves could smile. He pushed his body against hers as she scratched his side, smiling. She eventually brought his head very close to hers, causing Quil and Embry to growl more audibly. Her lips moved very quickly and quietly, but I could hear her.

"I won't ever do anything to hurt him. I'll dispose of myself before hurting Jacob," her voice floated inside my head. Like a feather tickling my brain stem; so innocent and soft – but protective and sure at the same time. My name sounded astonishing in her beautiful voice.

**Sorry for the delay, I was having a bit of writers block. I see certain chapters, but I can't seem to get the connections. So this was sort of a filler chapter. Review please, I'd like to have some critiques. Let me know what you guys are liking and not liking about the STORY, lol. Not how much you hate Jacob or Edward, please and thanks.**


	14. Shards of Glass

Jacob flopped on his couch as we entered his house – Quil, Embry and Sam were not far behind. They followed the same suit. The house was much too small for these rather large men, all of which were shirtless and shoeless. The Bella before would've excused herself to hide the surge or red that inevitably would've spotted her cheeks. I sighed and shook the thoughts out of my head. That wasn't the way to think, I wasn't that girl anymore. Edward, Alice, Jessica, Charlie, everything was cut out of my life, I had to start over.

My hand flew to my mouth as I gasped, wide eyed. All of the boys looked at me eyes full of confusion and horror. "Charlie," I mouthed, unable to speak. "Is he okay?" My face twisted in pain as my thoughts turned to poor Charlie. My bewildered father, what was happening to him while everyone searched for me?

"I've been over there quiet a bit, Bella," Sam started, hesitant – his eyes moved from me to Jacob. "There was a note . . . left by _you_. That you were leaving Forks, you couldn't stand it," he paused momentarily, throwing one final quick glance at Jacob, who nodded. "It said you and Edward broke up . . . and you were miserable now," my mouth was agape as he spoke, but I urged him on. "Charlie was devastated to begin with; he had no idea if you were alive or dead; or even if you could fully take care of yourself. Renee flew down with Phil to start looking for any place you could've gone. When it came time to question Edward and the rest of the Cullens about what had conspired between you and the lee- your boyfriend, they were no where to be found. Carlisle never called into work, or showed up. Edward and Alice never showed up for school and Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper never made it back to their campus.

"So with a little suggestion from Jacob and myself, we planted the seed of doubt in Charlie and Renee's head. It was quiet a coincidence that you and the Cullens disappeared around the same time as you decided to run off. You're of age now, uhm then?" Sam shook his head, confused at what tense to use, but continued on. "Charlie and Renee were much more content with the idea of you running off with the Cullen family, rather than running off on your own. They fully believe that when you are comfortable you will come back to them."

"Yeah, good thinking with that note there Bells, no one would've have thought it had anything do with the Cullens if it weren't for that," Embry chortled highfiving Quil. Jacob glowered at both of them, arms crossed across his chest. All this talk of Edward and the Cullens angered him.

A realization washed through me. "Guys, I never wrote Charlie a note," Four sets of eyes glanced at me quickly, then to Sam. His brow furrowed once again.

"Perhaps it was Edward, already anticipating your change and the time period afterwards," I nodded. Yes, that was plausible. I closed my eyes as Edward's God like face entered my mind. In my mind, he was in his meadow – skin glittering as he ran his fingers through his blonde hair. A crooked smile gracing his marble features. My chest stung as I opened my eyes, looking at all the men before me. Each of them were beautiful in there own way, but none of them were Edward.

Jacob frowned at me, watching as my expressions changed before him. I smiled sadly. Before I could blink Jacob hurled himself over the back of the couch and was pulling me into a bear hug. I gasped in shock as my body crushed into his. Warmth flooded my skin as he held me. I relaxed and wrapped my arms around him, feeling more at ease. "You'll be okay without him," he whispered, kissing my forehead. "I promise you'll be okay."

One of the boys coughed, breaking us apart. "Not a word, any of you!" I snarled threateningly. "Quil, you wanna get throw out like a puppy that pissed on the carpet again?!" I yelled at him, stopping his snickering immediately.

"Bella, seriously, the dog comments have to stop – even if Quil does still pee the bed," Sam burst out laughing as he spoke, doubling over in his seat. Quil's face turned an odd shade of purple and he threw himself at Sam, causing both of them to tumble the couch onto its back. They wrestled back and forth in the tiny room.

Sam pulled Quil from beneath him and slammed him into the nearest wall, knocking over the tall wooden case that loomed by the point of impact. It's contents spilled all over the ground as I shot forward, catching the cabinet before it landed squarely on Quil and Sam – who didn't skip a beat and kept wrestling.

Embry and Jacob hooted and hollered; razzing both the boys as their wrestling carried on for another minute or two. Eventually, I pushed the case back up against the wall and quickly scooped up all its contents. Model airplane pieces were strewn about as well as some glass cups and plates – some of them already shattered from the fall.

They rolled towards me, Quil choking Sam gingerly. I growled kicking Quil in the head when they ran into my legs. "Bad _dog_," I hissed at them as Quil yelled a string of profanities. I nudged Sam in the side with my foot, "Go in that," I pointed with my toes – "direction," I finished.

Eventually their match ended with Sam flinging himself towards Jacob in an attempt to end the fight. Quil mistook that gesture as Jacob's entrance into the fight and bull rushed Jacob. However, he was ready for Quil and he stepped aside – letting Quil run face first into the kitchen counter in the other room.

Without a word, he picked himself up and stormed out of the house, defeated. Embry heaved a large sigh and took off after his friend mumbling more obscenities.

Jacob continued to laugh as Sam panted – sitting on the floor next to him. I rolled my eyes at the both of them, swallowing hard. My thirst was a constant itch in the back of my throat, always burning.

"I need to just get you guys a tug-a-war toy and let you go at it for a few hours," I sighed, setting all the pieces to the planes and cups on the toppled couch. I bent down and started sweeping up the broken glass with my fingers, unaware of Jacob's incredulous gaze. I peaked up through my hair leasurily to find him staring at me. "What?" I questioned as I stood up with the broken glass in my grip.

He sighed and motioned to the trash can. I strolled into the kitchen and let my grip go over the trash and the glass fell inside of the plastic. I walked back out, placing my hands on my hip, "What is it?"

He sighed again. "Bella," he breathed reaching for my wrist. He held my hand up in between us, staring at it intently. Finally I understood. Shards and pieces of glass stuck in and out of my skin where I previously held the broken chunks.

"Oh," I said lightly. I tried to pull my hand away, but his grip was rough and harsh as he guided me towards the kitchen instead. He pulled out two much too little chairs for us to sit in and placed my hand on the table top. Swiftly he twisted behind us grabbed the trash can and placed it next to the table. "Jake, wait a minute, I can do this myself,"

"Bye Sam," Jacob called towards the living room. I had forgotten about Sam, but I heard the door shut quietly as Jacob spoke. "Hush Bella, please?" He looked up with me with big brown, pleading eyes. I couldn't say no, I sighed my defeat and outstretched my arm.

Gentle as ever Jacob pulled the pieces of glass out of my skin. Every few moments he'd look up and ask, "Am I hurting you? Tell me if it hurts alright?" I chuckled once and he ended up pushing on piece in further. I laughed as he cursed, once again questioning if he was hurting me or not.

His face was very close to my hand as he worked on removing all the shards. I could feel the tingle of his warm breath throughout my entire body. I closed my eyes and let myself be wrapped in the forest type of scent he was giving off. He wetted a cloth and whipped down my hand softly. I closed my eyes, enjoying the sensation.

Suddenly, I felt his very warm lips kiss the top of my hand delicately. My lips up turned in a smile as I opened my eyes. "Is m'lady pleased?" His lips moved against my skin as he gazed up at me.

"Why thank you Mr. Black, I believe that adds 3 years onto your life, in addition to lifetime servitude," we both laughed in delight as he released my hand. We didn't bother getting up – rather we continued to talk for an incalculable amount of time.

**What do we think? I'm still not sure on any of their fates, including Edwards. Watch out y'all it could go either way.**


	15. Do As Your Told

**Anonymous POV**

I scratched at the walls effortlessly. My confinements held my tightly, but I refused to give up. My nails had broken down into jagged, rough edges and the skin on the tips of my fingers were like sand paper. The dirt clung to my skin unfaltering with my movements. The cement was cooler than myself and pushed on both of my shoulders. I wiggled my wrists around, continuing to scratch with the little range of motion I had.

Light washed over me as the cell door creaked open, exposing me to the world. I snarled and threw myself forward at whoever stood before me. I did not care who it was, that wasn't important. What was important was getting out of the dingy, dark, dirty cell and to the rest of my family. The figure I lunged at grabbed my arm and swung me around. I hit the wall outside and was held there.

"Be still my child, you are in no danger," a silky voice cooed behind me. I felt two strong hands on my shoulder, pinning me against the wall – leaving me no opportunity to escape.

"No danger?" I spat venomously. "Show me your face and I'll show you danger," I started wiggling and the person holding me tightened their grip on me. The owner of the silky voice glided back and forth behind me, as if they were pacing.

"You have such a talent, why not use it? We could use your gift very effectively and treat you exceptionally," the voice was next to my face now, his breath tickling my neck. I growled deep in my throat and shook my body against my jailer.

"I'll never join you, I'm not so god damn stupid." I snarled.

He sighed and mumbled under his breath. "Take care of this Emmett."

I froze, sniffing the air. Why hadn't I seen it before? It was Emmett holding me, keeping me from my attacker. "Emmett," I whispered. My voice was sad, laced with pain and depression as I felt my brother lift me into the air.

A sharp pain shot through my side as his fist impacted with my stomach. I struggled up, focusing my eyes on him momentarily. His demeanor had changed drastically. He was still immensely huge and had his brute strength, but he was void of life – more so than ever before. Dark circles hung under his narrowed eyes. I pushed myself onto my knees, staring at him.

"Emmett," I whispered, my body wracking with sobs as he came towards me – his gigantic fist colliding and crushing into my face.

"Do what you're told, Alice." His gruff voice order as he threw me back into the tiny cell.


	16. Uncontrolled

**Edward POV**

I snarled as I heard voices coming closer. Their thoughts came at me loud and clear. Aro had plans for Alice, Emmett and I. We had the abilities he craved for his coven. Emmett's mind was easily manipulated – he had no idea what he was doing to us. His mind was a series of orders then just blankness.

"Edward, I know you know what I'm about to say dear," his voice was soft and ancient as he spoke through the bars. Yes, I knew what he wanted to tell me.

"You're crazy Aro, I will never be a part of this twisted little dictatorship you call a coven," I hissed. His thoughts jumped back and forth. I saw old Italy, Alice, winding country roads, crosses, feedings and then he stopped. His thoughts halted on my Bella. I took a sharp intake of breath.

She was laying in blood in our meadow, I had just changed her. She was barely through her transformation without me. Aro stood over her, kneeling and stroking her air. "You see dear Edward, you don't know if I killed Bella on the spot – or if I let her live and could kill her if you refused…" his voice trailed off menacingly.

I growled deep in my throat. "So help me God, if you hurt Bella, I will bring hell down on your and your family," I snapped throwing my fists into the walls that kept me confined.

"Tsk, tsk Edward. Poor dear Bella hasn't had much an existence has she? Just imagine Jane having her way with her, Bella curled in a ball writhing in agony – just before a drawn out and crushing end. Her being ripped limb from limb and burned. You see, I have very persuasive ways." I closed my eyes. He was right; I couldn't let that happen to her.

"What if she's already dead and you're just using her as an excuse?"

His thoughts flooded me. Bella running out of the meadow and stopping at the cliffs, screaming in agony – during her transformation. Her power, it was amazing, she has an active power – unlike ours. Her pain as she screamed my name into the unyielding winds, painful balls of liquid heat erupting from her finger tips.

His thoughts stop abruptly as a dark figure stepped into the clearing where she lay. "No," I breathed. "Please, Aro. I'll do as you wish," my voice was barely a whisper as I hung my head, shamefully. I refused to let Bella get hurt because of me or my family . . . _again_.

Light engulfed the cell as the door ached open. Before me stood the most heart wrenching vision I'd seen in a very long time. Alice stood a few feet in front of Emmett, her eyes sunken in and her skin dirty. She had her eyes closed and did not move as I took a step forward. I raised my hand and stroked her sunken jaw line – still no reaction. I strained to hear her thoughts – but gained nothing. She was closed off to me, not counting the fuzzy buzzing sound coming from her mind. Emmett was just the same, his normal sunny demeanor erased. His shoulders sunk as he stood. However, his eyes were open – but dull and lifeless.

Rosalie stood behind him, looking less radiant. Her eyes looked at me frantically as I stepped toward her.

_Please help him. Aro threatened to kill Emmett if I didn't come willingly. Please Edward, do something._

Her voice screamed in my head, causing me to jump slightly at the intrusion. For a moment I saw myself throwing myself at Aro, snapping his neck. I shook myself of the thoughts – I must protect Bella.

Alice flicked her wrist lightly. "Jasper is ready sir," she hummed to Aro. Jasper, where was he through all of this? Why was he not protecting his wife? Aro mumbled quickly to an unfamiliar companion and he disappeared into a corridor to our right.

"I'm sure you have many questions, hmm?" Aro questioned me lightly.

I nodded once, staring at Alice. "What has happened to them?" I waved my hand in front of Alice's face but her eyes remained closed. The closer I got to her, the more I saw. Her nails were worn down to the bone and dirt clung to her skin and hair – this was no where near the Alice I knew.

"We've put a – oh what should I call it – a mental leash on them," he motioned his hand and the stranger entered the room, dragging Jasper by his knees. His head bobbed up and down as he was thrown to the ground in the middle of the room. Sprawled out across the stone floor – no movement arose from him. "Ah dear Jasper – your thirst finally over came you. It took much longer than we expected, so many weeks without and blood and you all did so well," Aro looked from face to face. "How do you do it?" He was staring at me now, quizzically.

"Mind over matter," I growled – seething at the reminder of the horrible burn at the back of my throat. Jasper groaned from the ground, attempting to push himself upright.

I took a step forward to help him, but Emmett's strong arms wrapped around me. "Emmett," I hissed. "What are you doing? I need to help him," his grip was immoveable against my weak, frail body. Weeks without good drained me almost completely.

A shrouded figure stepped forward, crouching next to the struggling Jasper. Her hair fell out of her hood and cascaded down her shoulders. The only tint I could see in the light was dark purple. She extended her hand toward Jasper, her razor sharp nails longer than any I've seen. Silently, she plunged it into Jasper's next, causing him to scream in agony. The girl grabbed a fist full of his golden hair and lifted his head up – never removing her poisonous nail from his neck. Her lips moved quickly as she spoke – "you will obey or you will die, you will not speak unless spoken to by myself or Aro, if you disobey your mate will be torn limb from limb in front of your very eyes," she hissed.

Jasper's fury of blood lust and fright suddenly stopped and his mind became silent as she pulled away from him. He stood up without a sound and stared soundlessly at Alice – who never opened her eyes once.

Suddenly, Alice's body jerked again. "He will not take well to the poison, you will have to rely on Bella to keep him in line," her words were dead and cut me thick. Her slender finger was pointed at me as she stared at Aro.

He stroked his chin thoughtfully. "You hear that Edward? You try to escape, you try anything at all – Bella will feel it." I nodded solemnly, dropping my head once again. "The same applies to you Rosalie." She nodded once, her eyes pleading with mine once again – all I could do was look away.

"Where are our parents?" I questioned, suddenly remembering.

"Don't worry about Carlisle and Esme, even your level headed father can only take so much of watching his dear wife being tortured," he smiled widely at his triumph. "The good doctor will be taking care of our corpses," he paused. "Oh speaking of," he snapped his fingers towards the shrouded figure. "Bring them in, but make sure you scratch on as they enter." The purple haired girl disappeared once again.

Moments later a small group of people filed into the room and as the last women entered the room – the cloaked girl grabbed her and swiftly gashed her wrist open with her nail. Blood poured out of the wound and all of us snarled together.

Our thirst was the worst it had ever been. Mine nearly surpassed the feeling I had when I met Bella. It burned so badly, every moment felt like sand scratched at the back of my throat. The smell hit me full force, but I pushed myself against the opposite end of the room as the screams started.

Jasper lunched at a middle aged man, sinking his teeth into his neck greedily. Alice snapped the neck of a teenager biting at his neck as blood spurted chaotically from the last few beats. Rosalie snuck up behind a couple and bit the wife's calf as Emmett – right beside her almost tore the husband's head from his neck – allowing blood to pour over his face and chest.

The screaming continued as they continued to pick off person after person. My mouth surged with extra venom as I hide my face in the wall. I curled in on myself on the ground – yelling, well screaming, to drown out the thoughts the humans were having and the thirst I was fighting.

I felt something warm against my side and turned to find a women hiding against me. Her eyes were frantic as she looked back and forth. That's when I smelled the blood full force. She cradled her bleeding wrist to her chest and shrank into the wall. Her eyes caught mine – I saw the look in her eyes as I opened my mouth widely, snarling. I reached for her, effortlessly pulling her into my grasp.

She screamed as I entangled my hand in her hair. I yanked her hardly, breaking her neck with a loud snap. Within the same moment I lunged for her open neck seizing the moment as her heart beat several more times, pushing her blood into my eager mouth. Her blood washed over my burning throat and through my body and I felt like I was so powerful. I pumped her body rapidly draining her of every ounce of blood she had before throwing her body down in front of me.

I stepped back, panting. I took in my surroundings. They were still feeding – the people had no chance. Blood was everywhere, all over each of us. All those years of waiting, resisting. I threw my head up in a howl as the realization of what a monster I was set in. I had taken her life, not knowing anything about her. I robbed her of children, a family, maybe grand children and I could've just robbed her kids of a mother. What had I done?

**A twist? I think so. I was getting stuck with Bella and Jacob, so I wrote on another part of the story. Review please, tell me what you think of this chapter.**


	17. Do Your Chores

Months had past since I was changed. My need to feed has wavered very little in this amount of time. I still quenched my thirst every 2 or 3 days, as the burning built back up. I stayed with Jacob most of the time, but they gave me enough leeway to wander off on my own for little bits at a time.

Sam and Emily got married last month. It was a very beautiful ceremony, Emily was radiant. Claire was the flower girl and as she flitted down the aisle – throwing white and pink petals on the ground as well as the seated audience – Quil never took his eyes off of her. It was quiet humbling to watch, his willingness to wait and watch over her for so many years. His eyes danced with her as she herself danced down to her aunt and soon to be uncle.

Sam's vows were breath taking – he caused Emily to tear up and most of the women in the audience to gasp and smile fondly. Emily's were equally as beautiful, promising her eternity to Sam Uley.

All and all, it was a fairy tale Quileute wedding. It tugged at my heart strings watching them both. Jacob squeezed my hand every now and then; reassuring me he was still there.

Since the wedding Embry imprinted on a Japanese girl named Akira. She moved to La Push after an internship program – she couldn't resist the landscape. She was a photographer and was just as taken by Embry as he was with her.

Jacob poked at my shoulder, pulling me from my thoughts. "You okay?" His concern was cute, especially when he furrowed his brow.

I smiled wryly. "Peachy, just thinking over some stuff." I nibbled on my bottom lip. He chuckled to himself as he pulled my closer to him. Things had been very in between with Jacob and I lately. He keeps me very close to him when we are together and greets me like we've been apart for years when I arrive from a run. He's become much more comfortable with having me close to him, playing with my hair, or laying his hand on mine.

I glanced at him. He was propped lazily against the arm of the couch flipping through the channels aimlessly. He stopped on Animal Planet, crinkling his nose at the fruit bats they were talking about. I giggled, pulling him out of his stupor with the TV.

"Wha?"

"You're so weird," I chirped at him, pulling myself off the couch and wandering towards the kitchen. At the same moment Billy pushed himself through the front door with a few bags of groceries sitting on his lap. I leapt towards him swooping up the bags quickly and putting them in their proper places.

"Hello Jacob, Bella." He nodded at both of us. He was still a bit cold and untrusting in my presence, but he was coping with me living in his house very well. I was the enemy after all; it was decades of fear and loathing he was trying to work around.

"Hi Billy, did you have a good day?" I inquired as I threw the fish into the oven to cook. Using my vampire speed I put together their entire dinner in a few moments – the only thing missing was the cooking fish. "Dinner will be ready in 30 minutes," I added.

"It was alright. Charlie's still pretty distraught over your disappearance, it's hard not consoling him – knowing what I know," he eyed me warily. "But the fish were biting. We stopped by Newton's afterwards – that boy Mike, he was asking about you," Jacob grumbled from his spot on the couch, voicing his distaste. "Thanks for dinner again Bella, we appreciate it." Billy nodded at me again, smiling a little.

"It's no problem, considering it's the least I can do." I pushed my hair back over my shoulder lightly – straightening my posture instinctively.

Jacob scoffed again, never taking his head away from the TV. "Before you we just ate take out, you're the best thing that happened to this house since Emily came over and cleaned it about a year ago," he laughed glancing at Billy.

"I don't see _you_ jumping up to pry your dirty boxers off the floor or take _your_ bowls out of that pit you call a room Jacob Black," Billy chided rolling over next to his son. "In fact, since you're not doing anything why don't you go do that now."

Jacob grunted changing the channel again. "Yeah, right," he mumbled.

"Jake," I snapped. That got his attention; he twisted his body to stare at me. "Do as your father says, for God's sake. He supports you, your eating habits and the packs eat habits at least twice a week," I grumbled at him. I hated whining at him like his mother, but he just turned 17 and was getting quiet an attitude.

"Uggh, fine," he switched off the TV and grabbed me and pulled me into his tiny room. He plopped on his bed – as I stood in the doorway; hands on my hips. "Well, I support _your_ eating habits Isabella Swan," he chortled.

I growled. "So help me Jacob, I swear," I mumbled as I snatched up his boxers and dirty undershirts off the floor. I threw them in the hamper – picking up some cans and a few dirty dishes as I went. I set them all in his dresser by the door. "Will you please go take those out and put them in the sink, so it at least looks like you did something yourself," I sighed, sitting down next to him.

"Alright, alright. I surrender to might Bella," he pushed my shoulder lightly. I laughed and fell over in mock abuse – which caused him to laugh even harder as he strolled out of the room.

While he was gone I reached over and pulled his window open. The room could use some sort of fresh air. I leaned out of the window, listening to the gray day. The ground was wet with the constant drizzle of La Push and the ocean crashed against the cliffs loudly in the distance. I took a deep breath as the wind shifted. That's when I smelled it. The smell stung my nostrils as the scent curled off of the dark tree line in front of me. It was a mix of blood and a new, but strangely familiar scent. It was a vampire.


	18. The Bird Most Captive

I felt a growl start bubbling in my chest as Jacob reentered the room. He closed the space between us immediately, smelling the same scent I was. His body was rumbling as his arm snaked around my waist, pulling my small frame into his chest. "Who is it?" He questioned, both of us still facing the window – reluctant to turn our backs.

"I don't know, but I will find out," I moved forward in an attempt to push myself through the window but Jacob tightened his grip. "You'll be right here, nothing's going to happen to me," he loosened his grip the slightest bit – but still did not release me.

"Look at me," he whispered. I was shocked by the softness of his voice. I expected edginess, anger, apprehension – not a soft, scared tone. I swiveled in his arms – facing him. I gasped as I saw the expression on his face. It was pained, contorted and sad. His eyes were cold and gloomy, a grand difference to his normal chocolate warm iris'. I opened my mouth to speak but he put a rough finger against my lips, hushing me.

"Bella, if it's them. If its Cullen . . . come back to rescue you again . . .," His sentences were broken and cracked as he spoke to me. His eyes fell to the ground as his hand dug in his pocket – he pulled out a silver necklace. "I made this for you a while ago, but I didn't know how to give it to you." This time he was rushed as he spoke, dropping the necklace into my open palm.

I examined it, holding it closely to my face. It was a partial outline of a wolf's face, made out of lines of metal. My palm was snow white underneath the pendant. It caught the little bit of light in the room and glittered radiantly. I smiled in spite of myself, it was beautiful – and it was from Jacob. "Thank you," I whispered, fiddling with the clasp as I put it on.

"Here, uhm, I'll do it, just turn around." I turned as he said and pulled my hair over my shoulder. His skin was warm as it brushed against my neck. I felt my body shiver slightly as he bent forward and his breath traveled onto my skin. "There you go," he murmured.

As he spoke, I turned quickly and before he blinked I was only inches away from his face. I heard his sharp intake of breath as he realized how close we were. I stared directly into his eyes, immobile within his arms. His breath swept across my cheek over and over. "Bella," he murmured quietly.

My head swam as we stood there – lost in a moment that we both knew would ever happen again. There was some sort of threat outside our window and I was in his arms. He opened his mouth to speak, but this time – I silenced him. I pushed myself into his body and pressed my lips against his. His stone body melted into mine as his embrace tightened and the kiss deepened.

He parted his lips and his scent whirled within me. His lips moved against mine quickly and desperately as he held my body to his. He broke the kiss, both of us panting.

I turned, trying to get out the window. If I didn't go now, they'd be gone soon. Jake grabbed my wrist pulling me to face him. "Bella, listen. If it is him I want you to know I love you," his eyes searched mine quickly, desperately. "You are the best thing that ever happened to me and I won't stop fighting for you. If it's him, tell him that he has one hell of a battle ahead of him," he brushed a strand of my hair behind me ear before kissing my forehead lightly. "Go ahead,"

Just then I was reminded of something my mother always told me. 'The bird is held most captive in the open hand.' I smiled to myself as I ran to the end of the clearing. I stopped just feet before the intruder, my heels digging into the gravel and dirt.

A blonde girl stepped out of the clearing. Her skin was an olive color and her hair was golden – much like Rosalie – curls cascaded down over her shoulders. She peeked up at me, trying to be to what seemed to be timid. Maybe it wasn't a fight she was looking for after all. I catch sight of her eyes, amber. Just like the Cullens, but this was not a Cullen I knew.

**Well, the necklace he gave her is actually a necklace I have. Leave a review if you would like to see it & I'll send you the link, FF won't let me post it here. :) Let me know what you think.**


	19. Part of Our Family

I narrowed my eyes at the stranger before me. My stance was ready to fight; the newborn strength still ran through my body. My body stiffened as she straitened up, showing herself to me. "Tanya," I gasped.

"Hello Bella, it's nice to see you again – even in these circumstances," she glanced at the area behind me – right to Jacob I assumed.

"What are you doing here?" I inquired. "If the Cullens sent you, don't waste your breath," I started, but she cut me off swiftly.

"Actually, I was wondering where they are at the moment. We have a," she paused briefly, "problem in Denali and could use their assistance. No one can seem to get in contact with them as of yet, so we came searching for you," she grinned momentarily. "Imagine our surprise when we found you here. Did Edward leave you after your change?" There was an edge to her voice that stung me, I winced as she spoke.

"They're gone. I don't know where, they were gone as soon as I was changed. They left Tanya, I suggest you leave to," I stole a quick look over my shoulder to Jacob. "There's a treaty in Forks, made by the Carlisle. You can't be on Quileute land," I finished broadly – crossing my arms over my chest.

"Why Bella, then what are you doing here?" She purred. Suddenly, behind me I felt Jacob wrap his arm protectively around my waist, his chest rumbling with a growl.

"Get off our land _leech_," He snarled at her. Tanya's lips pulled up in a mischievous grin.

"Oh goodness, I understand now. Edward left _you_," she nodded at me, sneering. "Because you weren't what he thought you'd be as a vampire. You're still ordinary, even by _vampire_ standards." She was laughing now as I fought the urge to leap at her. "And now you're with a Mutt, because you can't get any better," she threw her head back and her hair curtained behind her.

I pushed myself back into Jacob as the lump grew in my throat. Maybe that is why he left. My chest tensed with pain as I watched her laugh at me. I felt his grasp tighten again; if I had been human it would have been crushing – now it was just slightly comforting.

"Leave now and we won't follow you. If you don't leave, we will tear you apart," a new voice spoke. This time it was Sam's authoritative tone that echoed through my mind. Jacob must have called him when he didn't recognize Tanya.

Tanya scrunched her face up at Sam, just like a child. "Bella won't tell me, so maybe you will doggie," she laughed to herself. "Why do you keep her? She's a vampire just like me. She'll live forever, and she'll slip sometime, she'll kill a human. All us veggies have before, it's just a fact. She'll come across someone in her lifetime, who's blood smells so delicious, she'll kill them within seconds, drain them and leave them there without a second thought," she pointed me, a menacing grin pulled back over her sharp teeth.

"Edward didn't," I whispered, shocked at the confidence in my voice. "I was his La Tua Cantante, and he didn't kill me," I spoke as I remembered how he described his attraction to me.

Tanya's face became very serious. "He should've," her voice was hard and serious as her eyes bore into me.

"Why we protect her is our business, but its best you know that we **will** defend her as well," Sam stepped forward, closer to her. "You have no place here and we do out number you, it would be wise if you left quickly, for your own good."

"Fine then, keep her. She was pathetic as a human, pathetic as a vampire and she was never good enough for Edward in either world." With her final words she turned on her heels and disappeared into the forest without a sound.

We all stood there for a while, taking in the severity of what just happened. "Bella," Jacob broke the silence, startling me out of my thoughts. "You know she's wrong right?" I hung my head, averting my eyes from his as we stood.

Before a sigh escaped my lips Sam stood in front of me, his rough hand holding my face even with his. His eyes were soft and concerned as he spoke. "You are our family Bella, even if we do live in separate worlds. You have a good heart and a good soul. Our pack has ran with you, we've spent time with you, and we've accepted you. Jacob loves you, and we love you like a sister." He glanced over my head to Jacob, who still held me close to him. "The Cullens left for whatever reason, we can't make assumptions and we can't think it's even because of you. No matter what happens, if they come back or if they really are gone, whatever choice you make – the pack is here for you." He took a deep breath and tightened his grip on my chin, forcing me to hold his gaze. "Don't you dare believe you are anything like the leech, you still have a great deal of humanity in you Bella, and no one will take that from you while we're around."


	20. Letting Go

Jake's engine roared down the road as we both sat, saying nothing. The newly restored radio hummed a song coating the almost silence. Jake reached forward quickly turning the song up. He smiled widely and mouthed the words, looking at me. _"Woo-hoo, but you know I'm yours. Woo-hoo, and I know you're mine. Woo-hoo, and that's for all of time. Woo-ee-oo, I look just like Buddy Holly. Oh-Oh, and you're Mary Tyler Moore. I don't care what they say about us anyway."_

I smiled, I couldn't help myself. But my smile quickly vanished as I realized we were still speeding down the highway and he wasn't even glancing at the road. "Jake!" I yelped, exasperated at his lack of driving skills. Just because we were both nearly indestructible didn't mean we couldn't use a little tact now and then.

We were meeting the pack in Seattle for a little rest and relaxation. They'd been pulling double shifts for 7 months straight now. A rouge vampire strayed into Forks, causing trouble here and there. She was pretty crafty though, after all it took the boys and myself 7 months to catch and destroy her. Imagine her shock when she was confronted by _another_ vampire with a pack of werewolves behind her.

Quil and Embry weren't that far ahead of us, I could hear them revving their new Suzuki twin motorcycles. Sam bought it for them; well he bought something for all of us. Jake got a Jaguar and Paul got an off road Jeep. Sam gave me an iPod and an expensive stereo as well.

Seattle's bright city lights blinded me momentarily as we pulled off the highway and onto the surface streets. Quil and Embry came into our view, stopped about a block a head. I sighed as Jake twisted around, his blinker ticking as we pulled close to the curb. "Is this it?" I asked, confused.

"I guess so. Jared said this place was pretty fun," Jake eyed me for a second before getting out of the car. I followed in suit, opening the door into the onslaught of rain and wind. Jake was at my side quickly, his hand in the small of my back guiding me into the building as Quil and Embry secured their bikes. I could hear the music already – my hearing being above average.

The inside was much more exuberant than the bland outside. Strobe lights flashed in every direction while music pulsed out of large stereos mounted on each wall. People were dancing erratically in the middle of the big room, and the bar was covered with even more people.

"Isn't it great?" Jake yelled into my ear. He was still guiding me towards the rest of the pack. Sam, Paul, and Jared lounged against the wall on one side of the room. 

"You don't have to yell and great isn't the word I would use . . . " I spoke evenly. I didn't even have to talk close to his ear; I knew he could hear me. He smiled for a moment then mumbled, 

"Give it a chance Bells." 

The night was fairly uneventful. A few guys tried talking to me, but Jacob looming around scared them off – not that I mind though. Suddenly, I felt a tugging at my wrist. It was Jake. His eyes were pleading. "Oh my God, are you serious?" He's been asking me to dance all night.

"Puh-leeease Bella?" He begged. I couldn't resist. Reluctantly I nodded and almost instantaneously I was drug into the sea of people. We slid into the beat easily, Jake's hands on my hips as I rest my head on his chest. I moved myself back and forth against his warmth – a sudden impulse to be closer to him started to build inside of him. I could hear his fast paced heartbeat underneath his tight shirt. 

"_Like a gift from the heavens, it was easy to tell,  
It was love from above, that could save me from hell, She had fire in her soul it was easy to see, how the devil himself could be pulled out of me,"_

I pulled myself closer to him. I didn't know what this feeling was; it was familiar, but so different at the same time. His hands moved up and down on my hips as I rocked them back and forth. I tightened my grip on back, steadying myself against his solid frame. His solid, _warm_, frame.

We'd been very close lately, closer than we've ever been. Every once in a while, he'd kiss me. Every time his lips touched mine, it felt like my world had been blown away. He's wanted to be with me for so long now, and all this time I've been denying him. Denying him because I'm still too scared. Well, it was time to stop being scared. To start being happy again.

Slowly, I looked up at Jake, who was smiling triumphantly. I touched the side of his face, confusing him. "Bells, you alright?" I was more than alright, I was letting go. The song hit its chorus as I pulled myself up against his body and pushed my lips against his.

**I hate this chapter, a lot. I've have writers block for months. & I feel like shit for leaving you guys. I think I might go back and change this later one. Where do you all think this story ****should go? I'm at a loss, lol. I need help.**


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